Sitting at the Cool Table: Things I Learned at The Southern C Summit

It's been almost two weeks since my trip to the The Southern C Summit, and I have to tell ya' - I'm still reeling from the experience with squealy, girlish delight every time I get a chance to blab someone's ear off about it. For a gal who's usually in the corner venting about how the world needs to get it's act together while heatedly sloshing her gin/red wine/whatever-was-left-in-her-liquor-cabinet in the process, you KNOW I don't get this way often. 

These are my stories. 

*bleeng bleeng*

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Aw snap! In Jekyll, y'all!

I was a kind of weird kid. Not on purpose, really. I've always been that person who needed to experience things so deeply, so fervently that there was no possible way I'd forget the people, things, and places involved. It turned me into the loud, impatient, motor-mouth spaz I am today... mediocrity became my greatest fear. For this, I never quite fit in - and I'm pretty sure I was okay with it. The in, around, and on the periphery is where I liked to be. Between the crooks and crannies of life, I found my misfit, bohemian soul-mates in high school and college and beyond... and my life has been anything but dull since.

ANYWAYS.

Post-grad life feels like being launched into high school all over again, except decisions and responsibilities have be weighed far more carefully (but at least I can drink). Things are still a little awkward. There are the "cliques" - not in a bad way necessarily - and, you still have to earn your right to sit at the cool table. However, those beautiful misfits of my youth have now become the spice of the big kid world that makes life interesting, and they're making a name for themselves -- and the lucky ones, a living doin' their thang.

I feel like I met a lot of those delightful people at The Southern C Summit, a conference for entrepreneurs, PR folks, and collective "creatives" -- all with a Southern flair. A fellow attendee, Shani Gilchrist of Camille Maurice, commented, "It was like camp on steroids -- but with cocktails and extremely well-dressed campers." Perfectly stated, Shani.

I learned A LOT over those few days from a bevy of presenters, but it really boiled down to a few key points that really stuck with me:

1. Be authentic.
:: Sounds like a "duh" thing. But, HOW many times have we tried to re-mold and re-shape ourselves to meet the expectations of what we THINK everyone else wants to see/hear/read? Placing authenticity as one of your core values in the creative pursuit can provide some serious motivation and keep you centered. I think it's different than the cliche "Be yourself!" notions - you gotta play the game a little, but you CAN find ways to reach your audience while still maintaining a sense of identity.

>> Side note: Being authentic also prevents you from being a copy-cat. NOBODY LIKES A COPY CAT, Y'ALL.

2. Fill a void.
:: Similar to above, you have to do more than just "be different" - being off-the-wall may get you attention, but it's not sustainable if you don't meet a need or spur growth. I met a lady named Angee who introduced me to her product, Sheic Journals (OH MAH GAH people, I love a good planner/journal!). In chatting with her she said, "It was really a selfish thing." She was tired of the conventional journal/planners that overall just didn't quiiiiite fit all she wanted and needed from a trusty journal (and you ladies KNOW how attached we get to those things). So she designed one for herself - and now she's got a whole line of cool colors and designs to choose from. CASE. IN. POINT. Note that your "void" doesn't have to be product, though; it can be an idea, an event, or even a voice for a group of inspired people - much like The Southern Coterie itself.

>> You KNOW you've had that "wouldn't it be nice if _blank_..." moment. Explore it.

3. Your dream job doesn't exist: You have to create it.
:: This was music to my ears! I've struggled to fit into a job "title" and/or specific occupation that met my interests and talents. Similarly, my mind drifts elsewhere to all the things I could be - should be - doing to feel fulfilled. And, more importantly, to feel like I'm making the world a little more special for somebody else. In chatting with a few of the #tscsummit goers, I discovered they felt the same. It was really - dare I say - inspiring to hear from speakers who've become successful doing things they really like doing AND adds value to other's lives. More-so, it was reassuring to meet and chat with other participants who were in the search of a similar fate.

>> I'm not afraid of hard work. I'm not afraid sacrificing. I'm not even afraid of the necessary "failures." I'm afraid of no one noticing. Which is dumb. Especially if you take to heart #1 and #2.

4. "Women" in this business are "people" in this business.
:: Though I'm not exactly sure how to describe the overall "business" represented at the summit, I'd say 90%(ish?) of the summit attendees were women. Y'all, feminism is my JAM; but rarely, if ever, did I hear things to the effect of: "As a woman" or "Because I'm a woman" or "For being a woman".... Sure there were a few contextual comments about being a mother/wife or how to balance work-life responsibilities, BUT it wasn't a female-centric, "girl-power!"-fest that sometimes leads to off-topic tangents. It was solid. Smart. Not preachy. It felt good to be empowered as an individual without feeling like I need to come out with war paint and guns blazing (but know I will if I have to).

>> It's not an "us-versus-the-world" thing here, folks. It's a "myself-for-the-world...-and-okay-myself" thing. Own it.

5. There are fashionable people; and there are people with style.
:: I felt like I was on a movie set. Y'ALL. These participants were the very essence of southern style and I loved every second of it... so put together, a little edgy, classic and understated with a touch of the unusual or unexpected. I felt like this was the first time I witnessed living examples of "personal branding." It wasn't fake or forced; BUT HONEY, it was fabulous! 

:: You don't need whole new expensive wardrobe to assert your personal style; but you DO need a closet full of things that make you happy and give people the impression right away that you are who you are. Or, you are who you are becoming (which makes it even more fun).

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So for those of you still reading this, the bottom line is this: Good ideas with good intentions will be rewarded - but you've GOT to get focused and be willing to put in the hard work, accept inevitable frustrations, and assemble a team of really awesome (and talented!) people who can bring your vision into a reality.

And be nice. 
These people were just lovely.

{You can see more photos HERE, but they're not their usual Celia G Photographie quality due to a busted iPhone and fear of getting my big-boy camera damaged in the rain.}

To those of you who helped get me to the Summit... you know I couldn't have done it without y'all.

Hugs & High Fives,

C

PS. Had to share this rad drawing by the amazingly talented Katharine Sandoz of Savannah, GA. She was doing beautiful sketches of the presenters on-the-spot, as well as a few attendees... I felt pretty honored to have made the cut. She even got my signature hand gesture!

             

Featured on the Instagram feed!

With the sweet & oh-so poised Twitter pal, Marcie!